MIL And Computers

SIL sells MIL her old computer which doesn't work and never had internet capability (no modem) contrary to SIL's statement that you could get online with it they just never hooked it up. MIL wants to use it to surf the internet and email so she ask Dragon to fix it. Fixing it involves him buying a modem for it, and a new operating program for it as SIL has screwed up the old one and no longer has the disk to re-install it. He also buys some more memory for it. In total he spends around $500 fixing it up, all he gets for his trouble is "what took you so long to fix it".

We decide to upgrade our computer (Dragon uses computers a lot in his job, so having a new computer is almost mandatory). We give my parents our old computer for Christmas, so they can email me. As soon as MIL finds out she starts screaming that "she wanted it" (Uh, why she already has a computer around the same age and after Dragon "fixed" it in better shape?). After MIL calls my parents several times and accuses them of "stealing her computer" and "taking advantage of Dragon", they buy a new computer for themselves and give the old computer back to us to give to MIL. IS SHE HAPPY??????

No, my parents have a new computer (which they bought with their own money) so MIL needs a new computer and Dragon should buy it for her. She calls him constantly a month before her birthday asking for a "new computer", those old ones she has are just too slow.

Dragon starts to feel like he should buy her a computer, after all she is his Mother. We fight constantly - IF he has spare CASH, then there are things we NEED, if he doesn't we don't have the money to buy MIL a computer. We don't buy the computer, MIL and SO buy themselves a new computer. Which of course Dragon has to set up, and supply the accessories for.

And they wonder why I don't like them?????

The Story of My Father's Sister.

After a couple of conversations with Jade, she invited me to retell the story of my father's sister, who we'll just call Auntie.

Let set a bit of background. My great grandparents came over on a boat from Sicily at the turn of the 1900's.....Which makes me pretty much the first generation of Americanized folk. Even though my father and Auntie were born here, they were still brought up in a different culture, so to speak.

Its kind of important, since I think that is part of why Auntie is well, fucked up in the head. Not an excuse, mind you. In life, you get choices, and frankly she choose wrong in many many ways.

Much like Jades Outlaws, Dad's sister has always been a bit off. So when Jade says things like "its little things that are wrong that folks do, but you cant quite prove them" I know exactly what she's talking about. All the little things add up after a while.

When my father got married to my mother, she wasn't, well, Italian or Sicilian. So they didn't like her at first(grandma eventually warmed up as did her sister(my great aunt). But that's when it kinda started I assume.

Auntie apparently, has always been jealous of my Dad. He's a stubborn goat, and went his own way. Left their area, started his own business. Did things his own way. Also being a male child in an Italian culture means a bit more for some reason, so even though Auntie was older, Dad's always had more responsibility.

So when I was born(oldest child), that's when those "little odd things that don't make sense, but try to be passed off as mistakes" started happening.

When I was a baby, I got one of those bad baby fevers. You know the kind that spike your temp up to 105/106 degrees. Auntie, in trying to help, tried wrapping me in a blanket to "keep me warm." If you know anything about fevers, that's NOT how you bring a fever down. Dad put me in a cold tub and eventually the fever broke. But still....

Over the years there was more, I'm sure. More than they ever told me. But Dad wanted to keep the family peace, so you know, most of it was petty crap, and not worth it, or it didn't effect us(like when my parents had my sister, the only girl in the family, her jealousy went into high mode. Apparently she slept with her sons friend who was staying with them at the house, apparently to get pregnant......To get a girl child or some nonsense).

But all that came to a head later on. When my sister was 5, she died in a car accident. Auntie was very "helpful", but kept going on and on and on how she was "in a better place" and how "she was better off now"....Looking back we could see she was a just a bit too gleeful then.....

But then MORE odd things happened. Things like when my youngest brother had birthday, he would get a birthday card, but cards that were for girls, not a boy. And the time I got married I got a coffee maker, in a new box, but it was a used coffee maker.....More oops. Or the time she said, point blank to my father at my grandmother's house my sister was "better off dead since dad would have molested her" to my dad, mom and grandmother.

Enough was enough. After 25 years of crazy, dad had had enough. So he cut ties with her. We'd still visit my grandmother, but would make sure Auntie wasn't around. Nor any events she was at. But grandma kept at my father to "make peace with Auntie". No one tries to do guilt like a Sicilian grandmother.

My father's response was simple and to the point. He'd simply ask her "Has she got mental help for her problems?" and when the answer was no, he'd say no to anything else.

Sadly, we also ended up cutting ties to grandma. Great lady, but she had this selective memory over items Auntie did. Remembered the good, but not the bad. When dad would go over items in her fincaials and money was missing(Auntie was obviously embezzling grandma's bonds to pay for mistakes made, by either her or her son's failed business), grandma would either denied having them or "loaned her the money".

So dad cut all ties, or as he put it, "they're dead to me."

*shrug* Grandma passed away many years ago, and not one of us ever went down to the funeral. Dad went himself, alone, and settled the estate and we haven't been back to that state since.

So if you got outlaws and stories start seeming similar, you might want to try real hard to convince you SO to cut ties. Because you will just have more crap, more excuses, and more bad items......

Another Wedding

SIL Comes For A Visit

Dragon's half-sister Mary is getting married. Since me and Mary get along great this should be a fun, joyous occasion. Right??????

MIL has decided that the cure for SIL's sick obsession with Dragon is for her to spend time with FIL and her half-siblings. SIL refuses to spend time with "these strangers" unless Dragon is around to hold her hand. So she had decided she will attend Mary's wedding BUT she has to stay overnight with us (even though we don't have an extra bedroom), and she has to drive to our house first so we can all go to the wedding together (which makes no sense as we live further away from Hades then Mary does, SIL actually has to drive past Mary's hometown in order to reach our house). Of course SIL is late getting to our house, which means we are going to be late to Mary's wedding, and once she gets here she proceeds to demand that Dragon drive her to the wedding. She is tired of driving, she doesn't know the way (neither do I), she is scared to drive in unfamiliar places, blah, blah. Dragon wimps out and agrees to drive SIL to the wedding leaving me to follow in our car.

At the reception SIL makes a big deal out of the fact that Mary's full brother Jay isn't there. He and his wife (Lisa) are hosting a couples baby shower and he choose to fulfill his prior obligation rather then attend Mary's wedding reception. Mary's fine with it and they have agreed to celebrate later, but as you can imagine SIL's catty comments are getting on my nerves I am sick and tired of listening to SIL prattle on about how lucky Lisa is to have a husband who puts her first, how wonderful it is that Jay is attending the party his wife had planned instead of his sisters wedding, ad nauseum. Dragon doesn't understand WHY I am getting upset. Funnily enough everyone else does. Step-MIL even tries to clue him in that in light of HIS missing BB's birthday in order to attend SIL's wedding her comments are insensitive to say the least. Not to mention SIL is making sure that everyone knows that Dragon drove her to the wedding and that he will be driving her home, because SHE doesn't like driving at night (neither do I) and Dragon is such a devoted brother. Well I have news for her HE is fixing to turn into a DEVOTED HUSBAND. I can manipulate just as well as that B*** can, and a plastered wife trumps a helpless sister. Besides getting drunk will make enduring SIL almost bearable, and the punch is good (I can even claim I didn't realize it had alcohol in it). So Dragon explains to SIL that he has to drive me home, but he can't she wails, "how will she get there, she doesn't know the way, it's dark". SBIL (Stupid Brother In-Law) suggest that she spend the night with him. It's only 15 minutes to his house and his wife (who is falling down drunk) can ride with her in case she misses the turn, SIL's bags are still in her car as she didn't have time to get them out. Problem solved. But NO, listening to SIL backpedal is hilarious, "oh she can make it to Dragon's house, an hours drive isn't that far, it won't be a problem".

(Dragon drives me home and SIL follows in her car)We get home and she lets her brat run wild. The boy puts a hole in my living room wall that has yet to be fixed. She doesn't even apologize. The next morning when we get up, she announces that she packed in such a hurry she forgot her hair care products and needs to borrow mine. After she leaves I realize a lot of my stuff is missing. But Dragon's only response is "she must have accidentally packed it, you can buy some more".

MIL has tried to kill me twice

Food Poisoning

The first time was when me and Dragon had plans to go on a second honeymoon, and my parents (who live in Hades too) were going to keep the kids BB (Baby Boy) and DD (Dear Daughter). As soon as she found out she started complaining that it was unfair my parents were going to get to spend time with the kids and she wasn't. She threw such a hissy fit that Dragon delayed our plans until she was off, so she could at least go over to my parents and spend some time with them during the day. And she insisted that we spend the night before we left with her, since the kids would be sleeping at my parents the rest of the time. So we get there only to find out that she has decided to take a road trip with SO, so she won't be spending time with the kids after all (Great news as far as I am concerned). It's late (all the restaurants in Hades are closed by now), and we are tired and hungry. She proceeds to feed us leftovers. I wind up with some chili (because Dragon doesn't like spicy food). BB comes over and wants some of the chili, I proceed to share. MIL says something about BB doesn't need spicy food. I reply he eats spicy food at home all the time. MIL and SO look at each other. SO inserts that maybe we shouldn't be eating the chili as it's been in the refrigerator for awhile (then why did you give it to me to eat). BB and I get terribly sick and wind up in the hospital with food poisoning. I spend what was to be my second honeymoon puking. And Dragon wants to know WHY me and the kids will not eat at MIL's, GIL's and SIL's. It hurts their feelings that we will not eat their cooking. Well it hurts my feelings that MIL gave me food poisoning and Dragon buys it was an accident. GIL often confuses salt with sugar and while Dragon may be willing to choke down an inedible dish in order not to hurt her feelings, I am not. And with SIL's sick fantasies only a fool would eat something she cooked for them.

MIL Tries to Choke Me to Death

I may have mentioned this when I wrote Credit Card Fraud. When I had my lawyer contact MIL about paying off the credit card she obtained in Dragon's name she was highly upset that I expected her to pay her own bills (big surprise). So she took off work and her and SIL drove down to have it out with me. At the time I was in bed sick and Dragon was on his way out the door to get my prescription filled. I heard yelling and screaming in the garage so I drug myself out of bed to see who was out there and what was going on (I also wanted to get to our phone, if Dragon wasn't there). And there is MIL and SIL screaming at Dragon about what an awful wife he has. When I appear SIL demands to know how I could demand MIL pay off her credit card bill after everything she has done for us? Um, exactly what has MIL every done for us? SIL starts in on how MIL bought Dragon a suit when he graduated from college so he could go on job interviews. Not so, I bought Dragon's suit, MIL didn't understand why he couldn't wear a nice pair of jeans and a clean T-shirt to an interview. And Dragon felt lousy about having to ask his fiancee to buy him clothes. So what has MIL done for us?????? Of course SIL couldn't name anything. Then MIL starts in on how she is Dragon's Mother and he will always love her and that he "owes" it to her to help her with expenses. And that he will never love me as much as he loved his ex-girlfriend (who is divorced again), and that I am going to wind up alone because I am a selfish unfeeling b****. Ok, I am sick, don't feel good, I want my medicine and don't feel like putting up with this C***, and Dragon is just standing there so.....................................I telling her that being a selfish, unfeeling b*** is better the being a free loading S***, and that IF she and SIL don't leave my home immediately I am calling the cops. MIL lunges for me wraps her hands around my neck and proceeds to choke me. Dragon pulls her off me and tells her to leave. After some argument she does. Dragon talks me out of calling the cops. If I had felt better, I probably would have called them, but at this point I just want to crawl back in bed, and I want Dragon to hurry up and get my medicine. I do keep the phone with me in case MIL and SIL come back while Dragon is gone. IF they show up I plan to call the cops, I don't feel like dealing with them.

SIL is Spreading Rumors

I AM SO Sick of This BS

My Mother called in tears. When she went for her checkup the receptionist told her she was so sorry that Dragon and I were getting divorced and that it was to bad he was getting custody of the kids because I was an unfit Mother. She had gotten the news from SIL, who will be moving in with Dragon to take care of the kids. SIL, is so happy she will finally have the chance to be a stay at home Mom. Mother wanted to know why I hadn't told her me and Dragon were having problems and assured me that they would help me hire a lawyer to get custody of the kids. Then I started getting calls from former high school friends, they were so sorry to hear I was getting divorced.

Uhhhhhhhhh, me and Dragon aren't getting divorced and we aren't having problems. I call Dragon and DEMANDED he come home from work immediately so we can talk. No, he doesn't want a divorce, where did I GET THAT DUMB IDEA???? From everyone in Hades who has been calling me, that's where. Dragon called MIL. Apparently SIL and Sugar Daddy got in a fight. She is unhappy that he can't spend holiday's with her. What did she expect? He can hardly tell his wife that he isn't going to be home for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentines, or Easter because he is spending it with his Mistress! Without Sugar Daddy, SIL can't afford the trailer and will not have anywhere to live. So she decided to come live with Dragon. She had called Dragon last week at work and asked about coming to visit us for awhile. Dragon told her that we didn't really have room for guest, that I was busy and wouldn't want company and that he would be going out of town on business anyway so they wouldn't have a chance to visit. Her solution was to get rid of me. I am not sure what she hoped to accomplish by telling everyone that Dragon and I were getting divorced and that I am an unfit Mother. She had to know it would get back to us, as Hades is a small town and everyone minds everyone else's business. I am just so sick of SIL and all this BS, and her and Sugar Daddy patched things up so she hasn't lost anything.........................If I didn't think it would make more problems for me and Dragon, I really wish Sugar Daddy's wife would find out about them.

SIL's Sick Fantasy Starring Dragon

SIL is Sick, MIL and I Actually Agree

Ok, in light of current events I suppose this is important info. SIL's (ex)Hubby is the same age as Dragon and has custody of his daughter. SIL meet him when she was working at the day care his daughter attended. So as soon as they got married they started trying to get pg, supposedly so there wouldn't be a huge age difference between the kids. Not long after their son was born SIL had to go back to work (which she complained bitterly about). There she meet another man Dragon's age, and had an affair with him. Eventually she divorced Hubby (who apparently was the only one who didn't know about the affair). The guy she had the affair with has no attention of leaving his wife. He has an executive position at HER FATHER's company, which allows him to keep SIL.

So after the divorce SIL decides to BAN spouses from family get togethers. She just wants HER family around at Thanksgiving and Christmas. I am so ticked off at Dragon for going along with that. His WIFE and KIDS are suppose to be a part of his FAMILY, how dare he not spend the holidays with us because of that B****, and what she supposedly "NEEDS" to get through the divorcee that SHE wanted.

So the holidays are over and MIL insist that she needs to talk to Dragon about SIL, and he has to come to Hades. I am insturcted to bring the kids over after lunch (when presumably MIL and Dragon will be through discussing SIL). So we get there and MIL, Dragon, and myself are standing around talking about the weather. When Sugar Daddy leaves and SIL comes out in her pj's, hair dishelved and smelling of sex (SIL has a trailer in MIL's back yard paid for by Sugar Daddy). She announces that she had the most romantic dream last night and proceeds to tell us that her and DRAGON were floating down the river on a raft and she had on an itsy bittsy string bikini and Dragon was rubbing suntan lotion all over her so she wouldn't get a sun burn. She then turns to Dragon and says "we really need to do that we haven't spent a vacation together since we were kids, Jade can keep the kids for us". Dragon is turning a lovely shade of RED, MIL is rolling her eyes and my jaw probably hit the ground.

Dragon later tells me that MIL is worried about SIL's obsession with Dragon and that apparently SIL has never gotten over Dragon getting married and leaving home, that she feels like he abandoned her. MIL's solution is for Dragon to spend more time with SIL. My solution is for him to stay as far away from the S*** as he can get. In light of her "dream" Dragon actually agrees with me. And MIL after the "dream" bit actually backs down and says she didn't realize how far SIL has drifted from reality. Although my suggestion that SIL needs a therapist wasn't greeted with enthusiasm. MIL thinks SIL just needs time to get over her divorce.

SIL Ruins Our Child's Birthday

The Wedding From Hell V Baby Boy's Birthday

Normally the fact that SIL is getting married would have me jumping for joy. After all if she has a MAN of her own maybe, just maybe she will stop obsessing over Dragon. But knowing I had a big birthday bash planed for BB, what did she do, she picked the day of the birthday party to get married. Insuring that Dragon will miss his own son's birthday. She is also insisting that Dragon has to give her away even though her FATHER and Stupid Brother will be there (which of course means that Dragon can't possibly get out of attending so he can attend his son's birthday party). And I just love her clumsy attempt at blackmail "We just picked the first weekend we could afford to get married; if somebody else wanted to pay for the wedding we could get married sooner and Dragon wouldn't have to miss BB's birthday". Gee B**** you could get married later and Dragon wouldn't have to miss BB's birthday, or you could let your OWN FATHER give you away and Dragon wouldn't have to miss BB's birthday. And I really can't see the rush they have been living together for MONTHS, so why can't she wait one lousy week to make it legal.

And this really takes the cake, she is insisting that Dragon has to get fitted for his tux on our anniversary. According to her he and SBIL(stupid brother in~law) have to go to the same shop, at the same time, in the same town to get their tux (and of course our anniversary is the only day SBIL can get off to do it). When I got married ALL the groomsmen had to do were get their measurements taken and send them to the shop I got the tux from along with a deposit, then the day of the wedding we picked up the tux and delivered them to the groomsmen. They certainly didn't have to travel out of town at a specific date and time to get fitted for a tux. How retarded is that?????

And he already missed Valentines in order to attend his stupid cousins wedding, which was out of town and which I didn't get to go to because SOMEONE HAD TO STAY HOME WITH THE KIDS.

How MIL Screws Up Our Plans to Buy Our Dream House

Credit Card Fraud

We found the PERFECT house, so far so good. So we go to the bank to get the loan. When the loan officer breaks the news to Dragon, that his wife BETTY (MIL's NAME) has a lot of store credit cards that haven't been paid off and a VISA card that she is only paying the minimum due on and has a 10K balance.

We inform the loan officer that 1.) Dragon's wife's name is Jade not Betty and 2.) I DO NOT and have NEVER had any store credit cards much less a Visa with a balance of 10K. He informs us that sorry but BETTY has used Dragon's social security number to get these cards so our credit is SHOT.

Dragon calls MIL, yes she has all these card (sob) and yes the Visa is in Dragon's name because she can't get credit. She claims the store cards were in FIL's name before the divorce, and somehow the stores must have made a mistake for it to show up on our credit report.

I contact the store credit card companies to get the snafu with them straightened out. She used Dragon's social security number to open the accounts, they were opened after her divorce from FIL (not before like she told Dragon), and she got creative and used the month and day Dragon was born and the year FIL was born. She opened these accounts when Dragon was 12 years old. Since minors can't legally get credit cards in their names they will close the accounts, and remove the black marks from our credit report.

Now for the VISA, she acquired it when Dragon was 18, so unless he is willing to testify against her there is nothing they will do. It can't be closed until the 10K is paid off (we don't have 10K) and there is NOTHING to prevent MIL from making more charges on it until it is closed. Dragon of course refuses to testify against his MOTHER.

I make a trip to my Uncle the lawyer (boy does he come in handy). He contacts the credit card company, and here in lies our salvation (I am a BITCH). When she got the credit card in Dragon's name as the primary card holder she checked spouse for other authorized user and she is signing the credit card Mrs. Dragon (so technically it's MY Identity she is stealing). I will PROSECUTE HER FOR IDENTITY THEFT (if it wrecks my marriage then Dragon isn't much of a man). I send a letter via my attorney demanding that she pay off and close the account within a weeks time or she will be prosecuted for identity theft.

Big surprise she finds some poor sucker to pay off the account and gets it closed. My attorney sends a letter to the credit card company and the companies that check your credit history that they have to keep on file that the Visa Balance was a result of Identity theft. So now our credit is fixed. We can get a loan.

Of course our dream house has been sold in the meantime. We have an offer on another house but it's older and needs extensive remodeling. But it's better then the rental house we are living in. I am just so upset that MIL screwed up our getting the house we really wanted.

Back Story Part III

SIL Wants to Live With US

SIL is obsessed with Dragon (I'll get into that in another post-it's sick truly sick). MIL has invited her Significant Other (hereafter known as SO) to move in with her. SIL has decided that she can't possibly live with them. So she has asked Dragon if she can live with us................Thank God, FIL had the brains to ask me how I felt about it, because nobody else bothered too. I will leave if the brat invades my home.

She came to stay with us for a week. Supposedly to help with the housework and baby. The brat created more work for me and if you call telling me the baby is crying (which I could hear for myself) help I feel sorry for you. First off she stayed up late watching TV, as we still live in a small rental house, her TV viewing kept me and Dragon up, and disturbed the baby's slumber. Then she slept till noon and complained to Dragon that I wouldn't take her anywhere. By the time the brat got up, ate breakfast and got dressed it was time for the baby's nap. So no I didn't take her anywhere. I offered to have her go with me to the store (which is one of the places she claimed to want to go) several times, but I told her she had to be dressed by the time I was ready to leave. She refused to get up and go with me, so it's not my problem. I was able to get up get the baby dressed and leave at a decent time, she only had to worry about herself. After the baby woke up from it's nap it was time for me to cook supper, I am sorry OUR schedule is so hard for her to adhere too, it works for me, baby and Dragon I am not changing it for her. Then there is the matter of supper, she refused to eat what I cooked and got Dragon to take her to McDonald's for a hambugher. Thus leaving me alone with the baby and the dirty dishes. And the night Dragon worked late she threw a temper tantrum because he didn't feel like running up to McDonald's by the time he finally got home, he just wanted to go to bed. Her HELP, consisted of telling me the baby was crying when I was in the bathroom. I could hear the baby was crying I just couldn't do anything about it at the moment. When I asked her to change the baby's diaper, she said she was going back to sleep she just wanted to tell me the baby was crying and woke her up (lot of help that was - and she didn't have a problem watching TV all night and preventing me, baby and Dragon from getting a good nights sleep). So no thanks I am not having her stay in my home ever again.

And it's weird. Most seniors in high school wouldn't want to leave their friends. But all SHE cares about is living with Dragon. I can understand her not wanting to live with MIL and SO, but she could live with GIL and attend the same school. But NO, she doesn't want to live with GIL she wants to live with Dragon. And to top it off she is in special education, if she stays in the same school she will graduate next year. If she moves in with me and Dragon a lot of her special education courses will not transfer and she will not have enough credits to graduate. But she doesn't care about that either. She could also live with FIL & Step-Mom, who have kids close to her age, but she doesn't want to live with them she wants to live with Dragon.

Since living with Dragon isn't an option she has decided to stay with MIL and SO, apparently that wasn't ever really an issue for her, she was just using it as an excuse to move in with Dragon.

Back Story Part II

SIL Wants My Car

Ok, first of all FIL, has NEVER bought any of his kids cars. He co-signed loans so they could buy their own used cars. But of course SIL thinks she is special.

SIL doesn't even have a JOB, so there is no way she can make car payments. She has no intention of getting a JOB either. But she is in a snit because her half-brother, got a truck (that Step-Mom co-signed for). HB has a JOB and he is not only making car payments, but he is paying for his insurance too. But since she is a couple of months older she is whining that it's not fair he has a vehicle and she doesn't. Never mind that FIL is currently unemployed as the partnership he has been in for years has been dissolved.

Step-Mom's car needs a new transmission, she is currently driving FIL's truck. So FIL makes SIL an offer. He will either pay $300 to fix the transmission in Step-Mom's car (which is a standard) and give the car to SIL or he will sell the car as is and give SIL whatever he gets out of it +$300, so she can buy her own car. She wants the car (never mind that she can't drive a standard). So FIL gets the car fixed and SIL talks her boy friend into coming with her to get it. Since she can't drive a standard he gets stuck driving the car back, while she drives his automatic. He parks the car under a tree in MIL's yard and that is where it stays until the tires dry rot, and dirt daubbers build nest under the hood.

Now SIL wants to trade it for my car. The car my parents gave me when I graduated from high school. I don't think so. Yes, I can drive a standard but if I had wanted a standard my parents would have given me one. Sorry SIL but you are NOT getting your greedy little hands on my car. No matter how much trouble you cause between me and Dragon, with your whining and begging. It's not my problem you told FIL you wanted a car you had no intention of learning to drive. Grow up and clean up your own mess.

Whose Baby is It?????

Naming the Baby

Dragon and I are pg. It should be a happy time but GIL, MIL, and SIL are doing everything they can to ruin it. MIL is pissed off because "SHE ISN'T READY TO BE A GRANDMA". I didn't know I was required to run my life by her time table. SIL is JEALOUS, and GIL is demanding the right to name the baby. Whoa, it's my baby, not hers and the only ones who should be involved in naming Baby Dragon are me and Dragon. After all she is the idiot that insisted her son-in-law and daughter name Dragon JR (because she thought it was so upper class) when they didn't want to and have NEVER called him by his real name or anything remotely resembling his real name for that matter. They called him by the name they wanted to name him. So he has one name on his birth certificate and one name that everyone calls him; which causes all kinds of problems (I will not do that to my child and we won't have a Dragon III). She hates the name me and Dragon picked out for the Baby and is complaining to Dragon about it every chance she gets. It's not going to do her any good, I'll be a bitch if I have to, I am the one carrying the baby, so I get to name it.

The Babyshower

Babyshowers should be FUN, right. MIL, ruined mine, and there is NO excuse. I showed her the cute Teddy Bear Themed stuff I had picked out. She knows the nursery is painted mint green to coordinate with the Teddy Bear comforter set I picked out. I showed her some affordable stuff, she could afford that I wanted and needed (diaper bag, sheets, stuff like that). I told her my parents were giving me the comforter set. So what does she do. She buys me an ORANGE (I hate Orange) comforter set with giraffes all over it (excuse me BUT I AM USING TEDDY BEARS - NOT GIRAFFES). Everyone at the shower thought it was weird, and everyone else bought me the stuff I was registered for. According to MIL, she doesn't like green and she doesn't like Teddy Bears (it's my house and my baby's nusery so who gives a F*** what she likes!). She told Dragon that I would need two comforters ????? And that she will be extremely HURT if we don't use hers. Excuse me, but why on earth do I need a comforter set that doesn't match anything else in the nusery? Not to mention that my comforter set comes with a light weight comforter for summer and then a heavy comforter that can be zipped up and turned into a sleeping bag. An extra set of Teddy Bear sheets I could use, some extra blankets I could use but and extra comforter that doesn't match I can't and won't use. Since I know she won't give me the receipt I took the comforter back to the store where she got it, and exchanged it for diapers, since they didn't carry the Teddy Bear stuff I picked out, and without a receipt they wouldn't give me cash. And that's another thing - the store that carries the Teddy Bear stuff is only a few blocks from her house (so it's not like she would have had to go out of her way to shop there) the Ugly giraffe stuff came from a store across town. Of course Dragon is mad at ME, I HURT HIS MOMMY'S FEELINGS. Tough S***, she HURT MY FEELINGS, but Dragon doesn't seem to care about that.

I Hate The Holidays - Part III

Christmas

The first Christmas was the worst. I still had delusions of being considered part of Dragon's family. So we are eating Christmas Dinner with my parents when MIL calls, Dragon's Brother and his girlfriend are at her house so we must come right over, because they cannot stay long. Never mind that we have just sat down to eat with my parents. If we don't come now we will miss BIL and BILG.

So we get over there because Dragon hasn't seen his brother in a year, as Christmas is the only holiday he shows up for. And Dragon's family's archaic ritual begins. The person who will be opening their presents sits in a "special chair" and all their presents are piled up in front of them. So SIL goes first and she gets about 25 presents including a very nice expensive present from me and Dragon that she asked for. Then it's MIL's turn and she gets some very nice gifts from everyone, Then it's BIL's turn he gets around 20 presents, Then it's BILG's turn she got 15 very nice presents including a designer outfit with matching purse and shoes and jewelry to complement the ensemble. Then Dragon gets a few presents then MIL turns to me and laughs and says we ran out of money before we got to you. It felt like a slap in the face. I mean the woman BIL has only been dating for a few months gets presents but they "forgot" their son's WIFE. And in my family you BUDGET your money to make sure you have enough to buy everyone something. You don't splurge on a few people and then ignore the rest of what is suppose to be your family. Since MIL isn't speaking to her Mother, everyone except MIL heads over to GIL's house to give her their presents.

Merry Chistmas in Hades

The next year is even worse (although I didn't think it was possible). I was prepared for the rudeness of no presents for Jade, but I wasn't prepared for SIL's stupidity. Dragon had the opportunity to buy a used computer and printer from a co-worker for SIL, who has been insisting she needs one for her schoolwork. It was more then we could afford but Dragon thought if we went in with FIL and BIL we could swing it. So Dragon asked his Dad if he wanted to do that. Dad and Step-Mom thought it was a great idea; except SIL had asked them for a typewriter and Step-Mom had already bought one with a word processor in it for her. She said she didn't have a problem returning it and giving us the money to buy the computer (which was more then their share of the computer would have been, but would cover BIL's shortfall) BUT since it was what SIL had asked them for they wanted to call and ask her first which she wanted the computer w/ printer or the typewriter. The situation was explained to SIL and she choose the typewriter. She was on a speaker phone so Dragon and I both heard her say she would rather have the typewriter then the computer.

(Side note SIL never goes to visit her Father, we are expected to pick up her gifts from FIL and Step-Mom when we go to visit them and bring them with us to MIL's)
So we get to MIL's Christmas and SIL unwraps all her presents which includes a very nice outfit with accessories from me and Dragon. She then looks at Dragon and says "WHERE IS MY COMPUTER, YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO GET ME A COMPUTER" and proceeds to throw a temper tantrum because she didn't get a computer. Dragon attempts to explain that since she told FIL she wanted the typewriter not the computer she got the typewriter. Turns out she expected a typewriter from FIL & Step-Mom and a computer from us. She then announces that she doesn't want the typewriter IF she can't have the computer too and calls FIL and Step-Mom and demands the receipt so she can take it back and Dragon can buy the computer for her (Wait a minute we have already bought her a present and she isn't mentioning giving it back to us so I can return it for the cash). So she makes Dragon PROMISE to buy her the computer and says she will give him the cash she gets back when she returns the typewriter. So DUMB Dragon feels bad for disappointing his sister and buys the demon computer with printer we can't afford, and she gives him $50 (the typewriter cost $300 according to Step-Mom) when confronted with that fact SIL admits she spent $250 on new clothes.

After all this Dragon can't afford to buy me anything or take me out for my birthday, which is after Christmas and no one understands why I am upset. Not to mention we are suppose to be saving for a HOUSE, but DRAGON's stupid Mother, Sister, and Grandmother are bleeding us dry. I HATE the holidays...........................

Which is really sad, because before I married Dragon the holidays were my favorite times of the year.

I Hate The Holidays - Part II

Thanksgiving

Our First Thanksgiving

I didn't think it would be a problem. Dragon's Mother and Grandmother both work, and they never wanted to be bothered cooking and celebrating Thanksgiving before we married. In their own words "It's our one day to sleep late". Until we meet Dragon spent Thanksgiving with his best friend's family and after we got together he spent it with my family. So I was looking forward to a nice Thanksgiving Holiday with my family.

Then the phone rang.......................................

We had to spend Thanksgiving with them. We had to eat at 11AM (when my family has their celebration; due to the numerous elderly relatives that live out of town and cannot drive after dark - with Dragon's family the only people that had to drive any distance are me and Dragon) we couldn't possible celebrate with them in the evening so I could spend some time with my family.

So we get to GIL at 11AM as specified. NOTHING is ready. Dragon ask when it will be ready as we both skipped breakfast and we are starving, She says soon. 12 noon comes and goes it's still not ready, 1PM, 2PM, 3PM, 4PM all pass and it's still not ready. At 5PM when we are suppose to be heading back home, because I have to get up and go to work the next day, Dragon's cousin pulls into the driveway and voila the meal is finally ready and we MUST stay and eat. I didn't even get a chance to run by my parents house and wish them a Happy Thanksgiving and we didn't get back home until midnight. Considering I have to be up at 7AM I am extremely put out.

Things haven't changed. We are suppose to alternate Thanksgivings between MIL and my parents. It never works. Everything is fine on MIL's turn, but when it is my parents turn MIL comes up with some excuse as to WHY we MUST spend the day with her. So we either end up spending the day with GIL, MIL & SIL (Dragon's brother never shows up for Thanksgiving) or me and Dragon get in a huge fight, so I am miserable even if we do spend the day with my folks. I hate being a bitch. But I have discovered over the years that Dragon will do anything to keep people from yelling, crying or pouting. As long as I behaved like the well bred Southern lady my parents raised MIL, GIL, & SIL always got their way. Now that I yell and scream with the best I at least get my way, it's not the best tactic for a happy marriage. But it's the only way my parents will ever get to spend at least some holidays with their only grandkids.

Back Story Part I

How MIL Caused Us Problems Getting A Phone

First it's important for you to know that Dragon is a Jr. Dragon Sr. and MIL had been divorced for 15 years when I meet Dragon, and MIL had been briefly married to someone else, but after her second marriage ended she got her name legally changed back to Dragon Sr.'s name and she insist on signing herself as Mrs. Dragon. How retarded is that????

So we are back from the honeymoon and Dragon gets a job thousands of miles away from Hades (thank the Lord, several marriage counselors have stated our marriage would not have survived MIL, GIL & SIL if we lived in the same town). So we relocate and everything is going great. I find a rental house we can afford in a decent neighborhood, we get the power and water turned on and then we try to get a phone.

The phone company informs us that Dragon already has a phone in Hades, and that we either have to transfer that phone here (meaning MIL's bill is also transferred here) or we have to have it disconnected. Dragon decides his needs to call MOMMY and see why she has the phone is his name and social security number. She insist that she can't get a phone in her name and that we will either have to do without a phone (remember we are thousands of miles away from anyone we know) or get the phone in my name instead of Dragons. I find this unacceptable as I don't want to be responsible for MIL's phone bill. Dragon finally tells her she will have to get the phone in her name. She says she will, but two weeks later she still has her phone is Dragon's name. This is one time when her using Mrs. Dragon works for me. I finally got feed up and called the phone company and told them I was Mrs. Dragon (which I am) and I wanted the phone at Hades disconnected (so MIL would get the bill). The next day bright and early before she can possible have her phone reconnected under Dragon's name I run to the phone company and pay the deposit to have our phone turned on under Dragon's name and get it password protect so she can't cause any problems with it. Can you believe the woman called and complained because I had her phone turned off? First she had no business having her phone under Dragon's name and secondly I think two weeks was plenty of time for her to take care of it.

Of course stupid, dumb, naive me didn't bother asking myself what else more important then a phone she might have in Dragon's name. She'll cause problems again, but that's another post.

I Hate The Holidays - Part I

SIL's Birthday

Yeah, I know most people wouldn't consider a birthday a holiday, but in Dragon's family his SISTER's birthday is a major event, that mustn't be missed by Dragon under any circumstances. She would be devastated, crushed, maimed for life (you get the idea).

So we are back from the honeymoon, getting settled out of town where Dragon found a job (which somehow MIL, SIL, & GIL are convinced it's my fault we moved out of town) when MIL calls to make sure that we will be "home" for SIL's birthday. Dragon tries to tell her that 1.) we can't really afford to make the trip (Our savings have been depleted by things like rent, the rental deposit, the deposits for the phone, electricity, water and food) and 2.) we both have to work. So MIL lays a major guilt trip on him and then adds that we need to buy SIL something special because she is SO DEPRESSED that Dragon doesn't live at home anymore.

So we get up at dawn in order to get to SIL's birthday on time. Turns out MIL had us getting there an hour early. It also turns out that MIL had forgotten to buy drinks & ice, didn't think she had enough paper plates and cups, and did we think the very, very small cake she had gotten would be big enough to feed 50 people? NO!!!!, especially since that was all she had to serve. So Dragon was dispatched to fetch all this junk, which he paid for with our credit card, with the understanding that MIL would reimburse us. Needless to say when we presented her with the bill she didn't have the money (20 years later she still hasn't had the money to repay us). So now we are in debt not only for the trip and the birthday present we bought SIL but for the party supplies. And MIL fails to see why I might be a tad upset. I also found out from various relatives that not having the supplies needed for the party and having one guest to show up early to fetch them was standard operating procedure for MIL.

And while SIL's birthday is a huge event, Dragon only rates a card (if they bother to remember). Needless to say they have never bothered to remember my birthday and once me and Dragon had kids they couldn't be bothered to remember their birthdays either.

In The Beginning -Part II

The Wedding From Hell

No kidding, my wedding day was one of the worst days of my life.

It started off nice enough, beautiful sunny summer day, all a girl good ask for. And like most girls I had been imagining my wedding day ever since I was a very little girl. I always imagined it as a day full of happiness and love, the reality was MUCH different.

Since Dragon told me his WHOLE family loved me, silly me thought they would be happy we were getting married. Stupid me was dumb enough to ask his sister to be a junior bridesmaid. Boy was that a mistake. While I am getting dressed for my big day, she is in the bridal room yelling and screaming that she hates me, that I am stealing her brother, and that she doesn't want me to marry Dragon. Needless to say I was speechless. She did finally knock off the temper tantrum, but she sniffled through the whole wedding.

Then when the photographer is taking pictures, that MY FAMILY paid for. My MIL insisted on having a picture of "just her family" made. A picture that I was excluded from. Again I was speechless, especially as my family footed the bill for the entire wedding, including the photographs. And did she offer to reimburse us for her family photograph, NO!

In The Beginning

Dating

Actually my future MIL, SIL and GIL (Grandmother in law) were very nice to me when I was dating Dragon. According to Dragon his whole family thought I was wonderful.

Years later when Dragon and I were having marital problems and MIL thought he was going to leave me she confessed that "She never thought I would marry him, that I was just slumming" (What a nice thing to say to your son).

The first inkling of what a selfish monster my future MIL was came when Dragon graduated from college. FMIL decided the day of Dragon's graduation that if her "girlfriend" wasn't invited she wasn't coming. As FSIL, and FGIL were suppose to ride with her this created a HUGE problem. FGIL insisted that she didn't feel like driving and that she thought something was wrong with her car anyway. Thus FGIL and FSIL had to ride with me and Dragon. This meant that Dragon and I would be unable to attend the after graduation parties as we wouldn't have anywhere to leave FGIL and FSIL. If that's not bad enough FGIL insisted on sitting up front by Dragon, which meant I got stuck in the back seat (where I got car sick), then she had to stop to go to the bathroom every 30 minutes what should have been a 2 hour drive took over 3 hours and Dragon was almost too late to get in line to graduate. I wound up dropping everyone off and looking for a spot to ditch the car on my own. And to top it off FGIL and FSIL didn't even bother to save me a seat. ................

Then Dragon thought that after we dropped his Grandmother and Sister off we could enjoy a nice romantic dinner for two to make up for the graduation parties we missed. We dropped FGIL off at her house and then headed to Dragon's house to drop FSIL off. His Mother wasn't home and FSIL refused to stay by herself (for crying out loud she was 15). So we headed back to FGIL house with FSIL in tow to leave her there. The woman who didn't feel like driving and who thought her car was broke was GONE. Our romantic dinner for two tuned into a threesome. A dinner I paid for btw. Did FSIL tell me thank you, NO!

But two weeks later Dragon and I said "I do".

Welcome to Hades

I know many of you have absolutely wonderful in~laws, who welcomed you to the family with open arms. You don't have a clue why all those in~law jokes abound. Sorry this blog isn't for you, unless you just want to read about how the rest of us suffer.

On the other hand there are those of us who have in~laws from HELL, this blog is for you. Some of you will read this blog and say "Man I thought I had it bad" and feel much better because while your in~laws are bad they aren't nearly as bad as mine. Others will read this blog and say "If only I had it so good, my in~laws are much worse then yours" and be depressed for days. And a lucky few of you while you have in~laws from hell at least have spouses that support you (please tell us, how do you get your spouse to stand up to MOMMY!!).

Feel free to comment, and offer advice .....................

If you have a story to tell and want to post at In~laws From Hell just send me an email at jadedragon6002@aol.com and I will be happy to add you to the team.

My Arrogant In-laws

I thought I had it bad, after reading some of the post on My Arrogant In-laws blog, I am beginning to see that at least hubby stands up to his Mother, Sister, and Grandmother sometimes. I did get to pick out my own house, at least.

Hopefully I won't have to get rid of Dragon to solve my in~law problem.