GIL Passes Away

Causing Trouble From the Grave

I feel bad for Dragon, I know he loved his Grandmother. She was probably more of a Mother to him then MIL ever was. GIL raised Dragon until he was three because MIL didn't want him and even said she wished he was dead when he was born. For some reason after MIL had stupid brother, GIL and FIL decided that it was time for Dragon to come back to live with FIL & MIL. I can only imagine how upsetting this must have been for him, and I have to admit I don't see the logic behind it. MIL has a new baby (that she apparently does want) to care for, so they send the toddler she didn't want back to live with her.

But I digress back to the funeral. First off MIL has decided that the spouses shouldn't sit with the family. OK, what's the point of me showing up if I can't sit by Dragon and offer support. And I have NEVER heard of the spouses being told that they aren't family, so sit somewhere else. I suspect MIL did this because SIL's married lover can't sit with her. But whatever, MIL gets to call the shots. Dragon insist he wants me at the funeral (since I wasn't going to be allowed to be with him; I actually figured I wouldn't go) so I plan to sit with SBILSW (Stupid Brother In-Law's Stupid Wife). But MIL who didn't want the spouses sitting with the family invites SBILSW to sit by her, leaving Jade to sit alone!!!!!!! And Dragon doesn't have a clue why I am upset.

Then SBILSW who has always been the center of attention at every gathering apparently feels neglected. No one is interested in listening to how her Mother died when she was 3 in a trailer fire and she never got over it, or how her step-brother sexually molested her (the same step-brother she allows to babysit?), or how her brother committed suicide, or how upsetting the miscarriage she had 2 years ago was, we are more interested in paying our respects to the deceased and offering support to MIL, Dragon and his siblings (after all she has bored us with these "facts" numerous times). So she starts running around asking people if the dress she has on is appropriate? That it was the only thing she could find, is it to low cut? Too short? Honestly all I remember about the dress is it was black I told her I thought it looked fine. But she runs to SBIL and tells him that she overheard me criticizing her dress and her feelings are so hurt (I guess that is one way to get your husband to pay attention to you at his Grandmother's funeral). SBIL confronts Dragon "mean Jade, hurt his wife's feelings". Dragon and I get in a fight and Dragon lets it slip that this isn't the first time SBILSW has lied about something I said.

Apparently when they came over to our house two years ago with their computer for Dragon to fix a few weeks before Thanksgiving, and SBILSW insisted that we go off on our own so we could "girl talk" she had an agenda. I actually did very little talking. SBILSW dredge up her Mother's death, her brother's suicide, her step-brother molesting her and her miscarriage. Since I have heard all this before numerous times I mainly made sympathetic noises, "that must have been hard for you", "I am sorry you had to go through that", etc. Since the miscarriage was recent I really did feel sorry she had to go through that; even though she smoked and drank beer the entire time she was pg. The fact she was crying when we walked up to the house didn't set off any alarm bells (hello the woman had recently had a miscarriage - I figured she was entitled to shed a few tears). She also shared that MIL & SO had taken all the baby presents they had given her back when they came to stay with "the brat" while she was in the hospital without telling her. I figured they did it because they didn't want her to be upset when she came home and saw the baby stuff, she called it stealing. I said something noncommittal like they probably didn't want her to be upset when she saw the baby stuff and left it at that. I never used the word stealing.

SBILSW, told him that I told her that MIL had accused her of stealing money from GIL. As a result she was much to upset to spend Thanksgiving with MIL (I guess that is one way to get out of spending Thanksgiving with your in-laws). SBIL called MIL and cussed her out, she called Dragon and fussed about Jade spreading vicious rumors but made him promise not to say anything to me about it. Dragon got mad at me, our Thanksgiving was ruined BUT I HAD NO IDEA WHY AS HE REFUSED TO TELL ME, until years later after GIL's funeral.

This time I can prove that SHE IS LYING. I challenge Dragon to call everyone at the funeral and ask them if I said anything about the bitch's dress. He refuses to do so, of course he also refuses to say he believes me "why would SBILSW lie?". He prefers to think she misunderstood, something she overheard. SBIL sends me a bunch of nasty emails. I sent a reply that I copied to Dragon so they can't LIE about what I said I have set their emails to go to my junk mail folder where they will be deleted without being read and I will not answer the phone when they call, because I am not going to give them another opportunity to LIE to Dragon or anyone else about what Jade said. SBILSW of course wants to make up now, she is so sorry for all the trouble she caused, why can't we be friends ad nauseam. She has to be crazy!!!! I have no intention of being friends with someone who lies about me in order to get attention, or in order to get out of doing something they don't want to do.

This post is already really long so stay tuned for how GIL Causes Trouble From the Grave Part II.

The Trouble Making MIL Strikes Again

Second Honeymoon

Dragon gave me a trip to paradise for our 10th anniversary. Before we left we took the kids to Hades to stay with my parents. Of course when MIL discovered the kids were staying with my parents for a week, she started in on her it's not fair routine. So Dragon insisted that she get the kids all day Monday, Tuesday & Thursday. My parents would have them Wednesday & Friday, and until we got back to pick them up Saturday.

MIL called Sunday night to tell my Mother that "she better have them ready for her to pick up first thing in the morning". My Mother assured her the kids would be ready by 6AM. They like to get up and eat breakfast with my parents and help my Dad feed the horses, cows, chickens and whatever other critter he happens to have. MIL laughed and said that was earlier then she had planned that as long as they were ready by 8AM, it would be fine. Supposedly she was going to take the kids sailing. 8AM comes and goes, 9AM, 10AM, 11AM, Noon still no MIL. Since the kids are hungry Mother feeds them lunch. 1PM MIL calls and ask to speak to the kids, she ask if they have eaten lunch yet. When they say yes, she goes ballistic and rants that she was going to take them to McDonald's, but since they have already eaten lunch there isn't any point. She ask to speak to my Mom and cusses her out for feeding the kids lunch, then informs her that since they have eaten her plans to take them to McDonald's are shot so she won't bother picking them up today, but she'll be by first thing Tuesday to get them and they better be ready.

Tuesday my Mom has a Doctors appointment. She was going to reschedule but since MIL is suppose to have the kids she didn't. The appointment isn't until 1PM so surely MIL will have picked up the kids before she has to leave at 12:3o PM. By noon my Mother still hasn't heard from MIL, it's to late to cancel the appointment without being charged, so she ask her neighbor if she will stay with the kids until MIL gets there. My Mother fixes the kids a small snack before she leaves because they are hungry. MIL never shows up. That evening MIL calls and cusses my Mother out; when she came to get the kids no one was home. MIL informs her the kids were there waiting for her all day. Well when they came by there weren't any cars in the driveway, so they drove off. They didn't get out, they didn't ring the door bell, they just drove by and saw there weren't any vehicles in the driveway and drove off in a huff. Uhh how did they know Dad didn't have the vehicles around back washing them? Why were my parents obligated to keep a car in the driveway? MIL snarls that the kids better be ready first thing Thursday morning and hangs up.

Thursday MIL shows up around 10AM. She tells the kids it is too late to go sailing. But hey they can go sailing with her Friday (my parents day to have the kids). They tell her they already have plans and NO they do not want to change them. She gets pissed off with them and takes them to her house, when they ask for lunch she gives them some slimy hotdogs straight out of the refrigerator and throws a hissy fit when they refuse to eat them because they have mold on them. The kids then ask if they can go back to Grandma's house, they are tired of sitting around doing nothing and they are hungry. MIL takes them back to my Mom's. She gets out of the car and tells my Mother that she wants the kids Friday. Mother tells her they already have plans, but the kids can decide which they would rather do. The kids butt in with the fact that they have already told MIL that they don't want to go with her Friday, that they have plans and they don't want to change them. MIL leaves in a huff and states she will call first thing Friday in case they have changed their mind.

Friday my Dad is outside feeding the animals and my Mom is in the bathroom when MIL calls. BB answers the phone and tells her again they do not want to go with her. They inform my Mom that MIL has already called, they answered the phone and told her NO! So they leave with my parents and the kids friends (whom my parents have invited along) for a trail ride.

Saturday Dragon and I return to Hades to pick up the kids. Dragon runs out to his Mom's to visit. When he comes back he is in a BAD MOOD. I ask him what's the matter and he says "NOTHING". After talking with the kids I discover the stunts MIL pulled and call my Mom to ask about them. She confirms everything the kids told me and adds that she didn't want to say anything because she didn't want to upset me.

So I confront Dragon, "What did MIL say to put you in a BAD MOOD, we were getting along GREAT until you went to visit her, now YOU are treating me like "S***" and I am tired of it". Mommy didn't want to cause trouble between me and Dragon, so she made him promise not to say anything to me. She just told told him a load of BS because she NEEDED someone to talk to (Yeah right, that's what women always say to the STUPID GUY when they want to cause trouble. If they didn't want to cause trouble they wouldn't say anything. So if any guys are reading this get a clue - when a woman says I don't want to cause trouble between you and __________, I just need someone to talk to what she is really saying is I want you and ________ to get in a fight.).

According to her they over slept Monday (and why is that my parents fault?) and when they woke up MIL didn't feel well. When she got to feeling better she called to see if the kids wanted to go eat lunch but my Mother had already feed them (and she couldn't call before 1PM to explain why she didn't show up at 8AM which is when she said she would be there why? my Mother was suppose to know she wanted to take the kids to lunch how?) Dragon is finally forced to admit that his Mother should have called before 1PM if she wanted to take the kids to lunch, that there was no reason she couldn't have still taken them to McDonald's to play on the playground and gotten them a milkshake or something -after all it's the playground the kids like not the food).

MIL told him Tuesday when they came by no one was there. They wasted their gas and time driving all the way out there and my parents and the kids were gone. I inform Dragon that the kids were there ALL DAY, that my Mom asked a neighbor to come by and stay with the kids until MIL got there because she had to go to a Doctor's appointment and that MIL knows this because my Mom told her when she called that night and cussed my Mother out, and that IF MIL had bothered to stop and ring the door bell she would have been able to get the kids, instead of just driving by. Dragon calls his Mother and ask her IF she rang the doorbell Tuesday. Well NO, they saw all the vehicles were gone so they assumed no one was home and didn't stop (and how is that my parents fault?).

MIL also complained that my parents wouldn't let her have Friday, and it wasn't fair because they had them all day Monday & Tuesday even though those were the days she was suppose to have them and they could have gone trail riding then. I point out that they couldn't have gone trail riding Monday or Tuesday because they were stuck sitting around waiting for MIL to show up (He didn't think of that). Not to mention my Mother had a Doctor's appointment Tuesday. And that the kids had been looking forward to spending time with their friends Friday, since they hadn't gotten to see them the rest of the week ( their friends grandparents are my parents neighbors - they were unable to come visit earlier in the week because their parents had to work). Dragon finally admits it was unfair to expect the kids to change their plans; especially at the last minute. He also can't come up with a good reason why MIL didn't take the kids to McDonald's Thursday when she had them instead of trying to feed them raw, moldy hotdogs because that was all she had - and they never cook their hotdogs, they like them raw. He also has to admit that there was no way my parents could get in touch with MIL because she will not answer the phone.

Dragon may no longer be mad, but now I am furious. First that MIL treated my parents the way she did. Secondly that Dragon got mad at me for something I had no control over. I am also very sad that we will never be able to go anywhere alone until the kids are grown or MIL is dead without MIL causing trouble over the kids spending time with my parents.

Retirement Blues

This Is SO Stupid!

My parents are 10 years older then Dragons parents. My Dad just turned 65 and he decided to retire. What's the problem you ask????

MIL has decided that it isn't fair that neither of my parents work and can come see me whenever they want (my Mother has always been a homemaker - MIL was a homemaker until she ditched FIL). She starts whining about not being able to retire. Give me a break she is only 55. SO has also retired and wants to travel so MIL is upset about not being able to go on trips with SO. She calls Dragon constantly complaining about having to work when Jade's parents don't.

The company MIL works at hired a new girl who happens to be African-American. MIL starts complaining about the lazy "N" while at work and makes sure the new girl hears her. The new girl complains to management about being harassed and MIL gets fired. This allows her to draw unemployment for awhile but she is constantly asking Dragon for money. She also manages to convince Dragon that getting fired wasn't her fault. I beg to differ. Even if I believe MIL's story that the girl came in late every morning thus creating more work for MIL, there were better ways to handle the situation. Like documenting the fact the girl was coming in late and taking the issue to management for them to handle. Not hurling racial slurs at the girl. And give me a break I am sure MIL was late to work at least once.

Her unemployed status has become permanent. MIL has no intention of looking for another job and her unemployment has run out. She has convinced Dragon that she can't find another job, that nobody wants to hire someone her age. Dragon is feeling guilty about not contributing to his Mother's household when they are in dire financial straights. So dire they ran out and bought a brand new, gas guzzling, SUV.

I will be so happy when MIL turns 62 and can draw Social Security.

Thanks Carmachu & SDex

I haven't had time to post for awhile so I wanted to thank Carmachu and SDex for posting their stories. If you have a story to tell I will be glad to add you to the In~Laws From Hell Team. Just email me at jadedragon6002@aol.com

I'll be posting another story in a few weeks.