This blog is for everyone who has in~laws who make their life hell. Welcome to Hades! After years of putting up with this BS, I decided to tell my story.I have also recruited some fellow suffers to tell their stories, if you would like to join us just let me know. Misery loves company!!!!

Sunday, August 27, 2006

MIL And Computers
SIL sells MIL her old computer which doesn't work and never had internet capability (no modem) contrary to SIL's statement that you could get online with it they just never hooked it up. MIL wants to use it to surf the internet and email so she ask Dragon to fix it. Fixing it involves him buying a modem for it, and a new operating program for it as SIL has screwed up the old one and no longer has the disk to re-install it. He also buys some more memory for it. In total he spends around $500 fixing it up, all he gets for his trouble is "what took you so long to fix it".
We decide to upgrade our computer (Dragon uses computers a lot in his job, so having a new computer is almost mandatory). We give my parents our old computer for Christmas, so they can email me. As soon as MIL finds out she starts screaming that "she wanted it" (Uh, why she already has a computer around the same age and after Dragon "fixed" it in better shape?). After MIL calls my parents several times and accuses them of "stealing her computer" and "taking advantage of Dragon", they buy a new computer for themselves and give the old computer back to us to give to MIL. IS SHE HAPPY??????
No, my parents have a new computer (which they bought with their own money) so MIL needs a new computer and Dragon should buy it for her. She calls him constantly a month before her birthday asking for a "new computer", those old ones she has are just too slow.
Dragon starts to feel like he should buy her a computer, after all she is his Mother. We fight constantly - IF he has spare CASH, then there are things we NEED, if he doesn't we don't have the money to buy MIL a computer. We don't buy the computer, MIL and SO buy themselves a new computer. Which of course Dragon has to set up, and supply the accessories for.
And they wonder why I don't like them?????

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

The Story of My Father's Sister.

After a couple of conversations with Jade, she invited me to retell the story of my father's sister, who we'll just call Auntie.

Let set a bit of background. My great grandparents came over on a boat from Sicily at the turn of the 1900's.....Which makes me pretty much the first generation of Americanized folk. Even though my father and Auntie were born here, they were still brought up in a different culture, so to speak.

Its kind of important, since I think that is part of why Auntie is well, fucked up in the head. Not an excuse, mind you. In life, you get choices, and frankly she choose wrong in many many ways.

Much like Jades Outlaws, Dad's sister has always been a bit off. So when Jade says things like "its little things that are wrong that folks do, but you cant quite prove them" I know exactly what she's talking about. All the little things add up after a while.

When my father got married to my mother, she wasn't, well, Italian or Sicilian. So they didn't like her at first(grandma eventually warmed up as did her sister(my great aunt). But that's when it kinda started I assume.

Auntie apparently, has always been jealous of my Dad. He's a stubborn goat, and went his own way. Left their area, started his own business. Did things his own way. Also being a male child in an Italian culture means a bit more for some reason, so even though Auntie was older, Dad's always had more responsibility.

So when I was born(oldest child), that's when those "little odd things that don't make sense, but try to be passed off as mistakes" started happening.

When I was a baby, I got one of those bad baby fevers. You know the kind that spike your temp up to 105/106 degrees. Auntie, in trying to help, tried wrapping me in a blanket to "keep me warm." If you know anything about fevers, that's NOT how you bring a fever down. Dad put me in a cold tub and eventually the fever broke. But still....

Over the years there was more, I'm sure. More than they ever told me. But Dad wanted to keep the family peace, so you know, most of it was petty crap, and not worth it, or it didn't effect us(like when my parents had my sister, the only girl in the family, her jealousy went into high mode. Apparently she slept with her sons friend who was staying with them at the house, apparently to get pregnant......To get a girl child or some nonsense).

But all that came to a head later on. When my sister was 5, she died in a car accident. Auntie was very "helpful", but kept going on and on and on how she was "in a better place" and how "she was better off now"....Looking back we could see she was a just a bit too gleeful then.....

But then MORE odd things happened. Things like when my youngest brother had birthday, he would get a birthday card, but cards that were for girls, not a boy. And the time I got married I got a coffee maker, in a new box, but it was a used coffee maker.....More oops. Or the time she said, point blank to my father at my grandmother's house my sister was "better off dead since dad would have molested her" to my dad, mom and grandmother.

Enough was enough. After 25 years of crazy, dad had had enough. So he cut ties with her. We'd still visit my grandmother, but would make sure Auntie wasn't around. Nor any events she was at. But grandma kept at my father to "make peace with Auntie". No one tries to do guilt like a Sicilian grandmother.

My father's response was simple and to the point. He'd simply ask her "Has she got mental help for her problems?" and when the answer was no, he'd say no to anything else.

Sadly, we also ended up cutting ties to grandma. Great lady, but she had this selective memory over items Auntie did. Remembered the good, but not the bad. When dad would go over items in her fincaials and money was missing(Auntie was obviously embezzling grandma's bonds to pay for mistakes made, by either her or her son's failed business), grandma would either denied having them or "loaned her the money".

So dad cut all ties, or as he put it, "they're dead to me."

*shrug* Grandma passed away many years ago, and not one of us ever went down to the funeral. Dad went himself, alone, and settled the estate and we haven't been back to that state since.

So if you got outlaws and stories start seeming similar, you might want to try real hard to convince you SO to cut ties. Because you will just have more crap, more excuses, and more bad items......

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Another Wedding

SIL Comes For A Visit
Dragon's half-sister Mary is getting married. Since me and Mary get along great this should be a fun, joyous occasion. Right??????
MIL has decided that the cure for SIL's sick obsession with Dragon is for her to spend time with FIL and her half-siblings. SIL refuses to spend time with "these strangers" unless Dragon is around to hold her hand. So she had decided she will attend Mary's wedding BUT she has to stay overnight with us (even though we don't have an extra bedroom), and she has to drive to our house first so we can all go to the wedding together (which makes no sense as we live further away from Hades then Mary does, SIL actually has to drive past Mary's hometown in order to reach our house). Of course SIL is late getting to our house, which means we are going to be late to Mary's wedding, and once she gets here she proceeds to demand that Dragon drive her to the wedding. She is tired of driving, she doesn't know the way (neither do I), she is scared to drive in unfamiliar places, blah, blah. Dragon wimps out and agrees to drive SIL to the wedding leaving me to follow in our car.
At the reception SIL makes a big deal out of the fact that Mary's full brother Jay isn't there. He and his wife (Lisa) are hosting a couples baby shower and he choose to fulfill his prior obligation rather then attend Mary's wedding reception. Mary's fine with it and they have agreed to celebrate later, but as you can imagine SIL's catty comments are getting on my nerves I am sick and tired of listening to SIL prattle on about how lucky Lisa is to have a husband who puts her first, how wonderful it is that Jay is attending the party his wife had planned instead of his sisters wedding, ad nauseum. Dragon doesn't understand WHY I am getting upset. Funnily enough everyone else does. Step-MIL even tries to clue him in that in light of HIS missing BB's birthday in order to attend SIL's wedding her comments are insensitive to say the least. Not to mention SIL is making sure that everyone knows that Dragon drove her to the wedding and that he will be driving her home, because SHE doesn't like driving at night (neither do I) and Dragon is such a devoted brother. Well I have news for her HE is fixing to turn into a DEVOTED HUSBAND. I can manipulate just as well as that B*** can, and a plastered wife trumps a helpless sister. Besides getting drunk will make enduring SIL almost bearable, and the punch is good (I can even claim I didn't realize it had alcohol in it). So Dragon explains to SIL that he has to drive me home, but he can't she wails, "how will she get there, she doesn't know the way, it's dark". SBIL (Stupid Brother In-Law) suggest that she spend the night with him. It's only 15 minutes to his house and his wife (who is falling down drunk) can ride with her in case she misses the turn, SIL's bags are still in her car as she didn't have time to get them out. Problem solved. But NO, listening to SIL backpedal is hilarious, "oh she can make it to Dragon's house, an hours drive isn't that far, it won't be a problem".
(Dragon drives me home and SIL follows in her car)We get home and she lets her brat run wild. The boy puts a hole in my living room wall that has yet to be fixed. She doesn't even apologize. The next morning when we get up, she announces that she packed in such a hurry she forgot her hair care products and needs to borrow mine. After she leaves I realize a lot of my stuff is missing. But Dragon's only response is "she must have accidentally packed it, you can buy some more".

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

MIL has tried to kill me twice

Food Poisoning
The first time was when me and Dragon had plans to go on a second honeymoon, and my parents (who live in Hades too) were going to keep the kids BB (Baby Boy) and DD (Dear Daughter). As soon as she found out she started complaining that it was unfair my parents were going to get to spend time with the kids and she wasn't. She threw such a hissy fit that Dragon delayed our plans until she was off, so she could at least go over to my parents and spend some time with them during the day. And she insisted that we spend the night before we left with her, since the kids would be sleeping at my parents the rest of the time. So we get there only to find out that she has decided to take a road trip with SO, so she won't be spending time with the kids after all (Great news as far as I am concerned). It's late (all the restaurants in Hades are closed by now), and we are tired and hungry. She proceeds to feed us leftovers. I wind up with some chili (because Dragon doesn't like spicy food). BB comes over and wants some of the chili, I proceed to share. MIL says something about BB doesn't need spicy food. I reply he eats spicy food at home all the time. MIL and SO look at each other. SO inserts that maybe we shouldn't be eating the chili as it's been in the refrigerator for awhile (then why did you give it to me to eat). BB and I get terribly sick and wind up in the hospital with food poisoning. I spend what was to be my second honeymoon puking. And Dragon wants to know WHY me and the kids will not eat at MIL's, GIL's and SIL's. It hurts their feelings that we will not eat their cooking. Well it hurts my feelings that MIL gave me food poisoning and Dragon buys it was an accident. GIL often confuses salt with sugar and while Dragon may be willing to choke down an inedible dish in order not to hurt her feelings, I am not. And with SIL's sick fantasies only a fool would eat something she cooked for them.
MIL Tries to Choke Me to Death
I may have mentioned this when I wrote Credit Card Fraud. When I had my lawyer contact MIL about paying off the credit card she obtained in Dragon's name she was highly upset that I expected her to pay her own bills (big surprise). So she took off work and her and SIL drove down to have it out with me. At the time I was in bed sick and Dragon was on his way out the door to get my prescription filled. I heard yelling and screaming in the garage so I drug myself out of bed to see who was out there and what was going on (I also wanted to get to our phone, if Dragon wasn't there). And there is MIL and SIL screaming at Dragon about what an awful wife he has. When I appear SIL demands to know how I could demand MIL pay off her credit card bill after everything she has done for us? Um, exactly what has MIL every done for us? SIL starts in on how MIL bought Dragon a suit when he graduated from college so he could go on job interviews. Not so, I bought Dragon's suit, MIL didn't understand why he couldn't wear a nice pair of jeans and a clean T-shirt to an interview. And Dragon felt lousy about having to ask his fiancee to buy him clothes. So what has MIL done for us?????? Of course SIL couldn't name anything. Then MIL starts in on how she is Dragon's Mother and he will always love her and that he "owes" it to her to help her with expenses. And that he will never love me as much as he loved his ex-girlfriend (who is divorced again), and that I am going to wind up alone because I am a selfish unfeeling b****. Ok, I am sick, don't feel good, I want my medicine and don't feel like putting up with this C***, and Dragon is just standing there so.....................................I telling her that being a selfish, unfeeling b*** is better the being a free loading S***, and that IF she and SIL don't leave my home immediately I am calling the cops. MIL lunges for me wraps her hands around my neck and proceeds to choke me. Dragon pulls her off me and tells her to leave. After some argument she does. Dragon talks me out of calling the cops. If I had felt better, I probably would have called them, but at this point I just want to crawl back in bed, and I want Dragon to hurry up and get my medicine. I do keep the phone with me in case MIL and SIL come back while Dragon is gone. IF they show up I plan to call the cops, I don't feel like dealing with them.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

SIL is Spreading Rumors

I AM SO Sick of This BS
My Mother called in tears. When she went for her checkup the receptionist told her she was so sorry that Dragon and I were getting divorced and that it was to bad he was getting custody of the kids because I was an unfit Mother. She had gotten the news from SIL, who will be moving in with Dragon to take care of the kids. SIL, is so happy she will finally have the chance to be a stay at home Mom. Mother wanted to know why I hadn't told her me and Dragon were having problems and assured me that they would help me hire a lawyer to get custody of the kids. Then I started getting calls from former high school friends, they were so sorry to hear I was getting divorced.
Uhhhhhhhhh, me and Dragon aren't getting divorced and we aren't having problems. I call Dragon and DEMANDED he come home from work immediately so we can talk. No, he doesn't want a divorce, where did I GET THAT DUMB IDEA???? From everyone in Hades who has been calling me, that's where. Dragon called MIL. Apparently SIL and Sugar Daddy got in a fight. She is unhappy that he can't spend holiday's with her. What did she expect? He can hardly tell his wife that he isn't going to be home for Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentines, or Easter because he is spending it with his Mistress! Without Sugar Daddy, SIL can't afford the trailer and will not have anywhere to live. So she decided to come live with Dragon. She had called Dragon last week at work and asked about coming to visit us for awhile. Dragon told her that we didn't really have room for guest, that I was busy and wouldn't want company and that he would be going out of town on business anyway so they wouldn't have a chance to visit. Her solution was to get rid of me. I am not sure what she hoped to accomplish by telling everyone that Dragon and I were getting divorced and that I am an unfit Mother. She had to know it would get back to us, as Hades is a small town and everyone minds everyone else's business. I am just so sick of SIL and all this BS, and her and Sugar Daddy patched things up so she hasn't lost anything.........................If I didn't think it would make more problems for me and Dragon, I really wish Sugar Daddy's wife would find out about them.

Monday, August 07, 2006

SIL's Sick Fantasy Starring Dragon

SIL is Sick, MIL and I Actually Agree
Ok, in light of current events I suppose this is important info. SIL's (ex)Hubby is the same age as Dragon and has custody of his daughter. SIL meet him when she was working at the day care his daughter attended. So as soon as they got married they started trying to get pg, supposedly so there wouldn't be a huge age difference between the kids. Not long after their son was born SIL had to go back to work (which she complained bitterly about). There she meet another man Dragon's age, and had an affair with him. Eventually she divorced Hubby (who apparently was the only one who didn't know about the affair). The guy she had the affair with has no attention of leaving his wife. He has an executive position at HER FATHER's company, which allows him to keep SIL.
So after the divorce SIL decides to BAN spouses from family get togethers. She just wants HER family around at Thanksgiving and Christmas. I am so ticked off at Dragon for going along with that. His WIFE and KIDS are suppose to be a part of his FAMILY, how dare he not spend the holidays with us because of that B****, and what she supposedly "NEEDS" to get through the divorcee that SHE wanted.
So the holidays are over and MIL insist that she needs to talk to Dragon about SIL, and he has to come to Hades. I am insturcted to bring the kids over after lunch (when presumably MIL and Dragon will be through discussing SIL). So we get there and MIL, Dragon, and myself are standing around talking about the weather. When Sugar Daddy leaves and SIL comes out in her pj's, hair dishelved and smelling of sex (SIL has a trailer in MIL's back yard paid for by Sugar Daddy). She announces that she had the most romantic dream last night and proceeds to tell us that her and DRAGON were floating down the river on a raft and she had on an itsy bittsy string bikini and Dragon was rubbing suntan lotion all over her so she wouldn't get a sun burn. She then turns to Dragon and says "we really need to do that we haven't spent a vacation together since we were kids, Jade can keep the kids for us". Dragon is turning a lovely shade of RED, MIL is rolling her eyes and my jaw probably hit the ground.
Dragon later tells me that MIL is worried about SIL's obsession with Dragon and that apparently SIL has never gotten over Dragon getting married and leaving home, that she feels like he abandoned her. MIL's solution is for Dragon to spend more time with SIL. My solution is for him to stay as far away from the S*** as he can get. In light of her "dream" Dragon actually agrees with me. And MIL after the "dream" bit actually backs down and says she didn't realize how far SIL has drifted from reality. Although my suggestion that SIL needs a therapist wasn't greeted with enthusiasm. MIL thinks SIL just needs time to get over her divorce.

Friday, August 04, 2006

SIL Ruins Our Child's Birthday

The Wedding From Hell V Baby Boy's Birthday
Normally the fact that SIL is getting married would have me jumping for joy. After all if she has a MAN of her own maybe, just maybe she will stop obsessing over Dragon. But knowing I had a big birthday bash planed for BB, what did she do, she picked the day of the birthday party to get married. Insuring that Dragon will miss his own son's birthday. She is also insisting that Dragon has to give her away even though her FATHER and Stupid Brother will be there (which of course means that Dragon can't possibly get out of attending so he can attend his son's birthday party). And I just love her clumsy attempt at blackmail "We just picked the first weekend we could afford to get married; if somebody else wanted to pay for the wedding we could get married sooner and Dragon wouldn't have to miss BB's birthday". Gee B**** you could get married later and Dragon wouldn't have to miss BB's birthday, or you could let your OWN FATHER give you away and Dragon wouldn't have to miss BB's birthday. And I really can't see the rush they have been living together for MONTHS, so why can't she wait one lousy week to make it legal.
And this really takes the cake, she is insisting that Dragon has to get fitted for his tux on our anniversary. According to her he and SBIL(stupid brother in~law) have to go to the same shop, at the same time, in the same town to get their tux (and of course our anniversary is the only day SBIL can get off to do it). When I got married ALL the groomsmen had to do were get their measurements taken and send them to the shop I got the tux from along with a deposit, then the day of the wedding we picked up the tux and delivered them to the groomsmen. They certainly didn't have to travel out of town at a specific date and time to get fitted for a tux. How retarded is that?????
And he already missed Valentines in order to attend his stupid cousins wedding, which was out of town and which I didn't get to go to because SOMEONE HAD TO STAY HOME WITH THE KIDS.